Inspiration From Fellow Fertility Warriors
This International Women's Day, we want to celebrate all the strong women who have gone through a fertility journey. Our hope is that by sharing others' experiences, we can help those currently going through fertility treatment draw strength and inspiration.
(Names have been changed to protect privacy)
When I was 39 my then husband and I had been trying to conceive for 3 years and had had nearly two years of fertility treatment. We made the decision to start IVF because the other treatment wasn’t working, however unbeknownst to me was actually having an affair. We signed the IVF paperwork on a Friday and exactly one week later he walked out and moved in with his mistress. So to say I was floored on so many levels is an understatement.
But the world turns and life goes on! I have restarted my fertility journey at 42 and I am going for egg collection next week. I am lucky enough to now be with a man who is walking with me on this journey. It has been a hard few years. Watching friends have their families has been bittersweet with the happiness I feel for them at times being overshadowed by the longing I have to have a family of my own and a loss I feel for something which I may never experience. The struggle is real some days especially the ones where I feel like I’ve failed as a woman, wife and partner because I haven’t been able to conceive.
I have a bit more perspective these days and try to be philosophical about my circumstances. I have a lot to be grateful for but there is a void there. This is helped by a great consultant and his team who are compassionate and humorous. I don’t know what the future will bring but I do know that my partner and I are doing all within our power to have a baby and if all else fails we have given it a good shot! Fertility treatment is difficult, the rollercoaster of hope and disappointment, the impact of having my partner injecting me with hormones for nights on end and of feeling on ‘the clock’ which isn’t the greatest aphrodisiac. But there is laughter and hope too and that’s the bit that I have to hang on to. Each fertility journey is deeply personal. Being kind and patient with myself is key...no matter what.
I had an amazing journey with Rotunda IVF and cannot praise them enough. They were fantastic. From being called a museum piece and being told IVF would not work for me, to being told I was getting IVF to humour me and that they couldn't deny me the chance of trying, to getting pregnant with triplets first time - three healthy babies, two girls and one boy who are now 19! I was told it was freak, that it should never have happened and that I'd never have any more. Seven years later, I got pregnant all by myself and had another little girl (now 11). Do not give up hope. There is always hope. I owe so much to everyone in the Rotunda. From the first meeting in the pillar room right up to when they were born and the after care - thanks so much!